Ken's Naperville Real Estate Blog : "I WANT TO KNOW WHAT MOM THINKS..."


I was showing a nice young lady some condos and townhomes in downtown Wheaton this evening.

Despite a cold and rainy day, my client was still excited.  She brought along Mom and Dad...

I prefer when parents get involved early.  Better early then late.  It can be challenging to deal with the personalities...

We were in the last building on the list.  255 E Liberty Drive, a six floor condominium building located right by the train station.

The listing agent was showing us the condominiums...

I generally would prefer to not have another agent along, but the condo rules required it.  She showed us the condo. 

My clients were impressed...

Dad liked the price and the hardwood.  Daughter loved the location. 

Mom seemed quiet.  Too quiet...

I had only met her this evening, but I judged her as a woman with something to say...

"I want to know what Mom thinks," I blurted out.

"I like the building," Mom answered.


I am not so sure.  We might need to see some more...


A Realtor you can trust. 


Comment balloon 18 commentsKen Tracy • April 19 2009 10:24PM


Aloha Ken, sounds like too many cooks in the kitchen! I try not to ask a question that I don't already know the answer to ~ no surprises.  Maybe you should ask mom what she is looking for! Glad to hear you are out showing property, always a good sign in the current market termperament.

Posted by Jamie Friedman, Kauai Real Estate Connection (eXp Realty) over 9 years ago

Ken.....let's face it.  Mom's know best.  Good luck with the family.

Posted by Libby Offnick, ABR, e-PRO, SPS (RE/MAX Executive Realty) over 9 years ago

what's that saying, if at first you don't succeed, do it like your mother told you?  I'll be interested to see how this one turns out.

Posted by Kate Bourland, Onlilne Marketing Mobile Marketing (Marketing with Kate) over 9 years ago

Lol.  I'm not there yet, but I imagine it's tough to let your children make big decisions without trying to take control and 'protect them.'  I'm sure her parents, aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, college roommates, work colleagues, etc are intelligent and well-meaning people.  Unless they are real estate agents in your area, they really need to trust an expert though.

Posted by Erik Hitzelberger, Louisville - Middletown Real Estate (RE/MAX Alliance - Louisville REALTOR-Luxury Homes) over 9 years ago

I love meeting mom and dad when I am assisting their children in purchasing a home for the first time. Dad wants talks about the condition of the house and finances. Mom looks at the color of walls and matching up the furniture. It is a great investment.

Posted by Harry F. D'Elia, Investor , Mentor, GRI, Radio, CIPS, REOs, ABR (Real Estate and Beyond, LLC) over 9 years ago

I agree it's great to have the parents involved from the beginning, but not when they swoop in at the end and queer the deal as has happened. I had that situation earlier today -- the good one, I mean. I think M&D were there to make sure I wasn't going to railroad their son into something. I appreciate that...they should be concerned. Now that we've spent the day together they can see that I'm not scary or pushy and I will look out for their son's best interests as his buyer's agent. Good luck with your condo buyer (and mom)!

Posted by Nancy Milton Holtzscher, Edwardsville/Glen Carbon, Illinois Broker, REALTOR (RE/MAX Alliance in St.Louis' Illinois suburbs) over 9 years ago

Ken: It's great to have mom and dad there, especially if they come from a higher priced market and they're not nuts.

Posted by Matt Grohe, Serving the metro since 2003 (RE/MAX Concepts) over 9 years ago

Ken:  Let's face it.  You are stuck with mom !  I have never, ever found a good way to get "out" of something like this... so all you can do is just try and handle stuff as it comes up with mom... and somehow try not to punch her out !

Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 9 years ago

Ken.........we do have to honor Mom and Dads opinions......they are protecting their "baby"....hard to get past that. You will handle it with finess and I like that you just came out and asked!! Way to go!

Posted by Caren Wallace, Portland Caren Real Estate (Premier Property Group LLC) over 9 years ago

I definitely like it when mom and dad get involved early. Too many times after the offer is written we show mom and dad and they don't approve. Is anything ever good enough for mom and dad?

On my first house, or "almost" first house, my dad flew in to Auburn. He nixed it right off the bat.

We later found a new construction home and so were thankful he did.

Posted by Missy Caulk, Savvy Realtor - Ann Arbor Real Estate (Missy Caulk TEAM) over 9 years ago

I am not sure if i always like Mom and Dad have to come an approve. I have good experiences and bad on this one.

Posted by Nannette Hilliard, CDPE, ABR, CRS (Century 21 Zwygart Green County Real Estate) over 9 years ago

The joys of the family.  Great to have the family buy in especially for those who want the family buy in.  Either way, it's great to have this issue.  In other words, it's great to have the business.

Posted by Larry Bettag, Vice-President of National Production (Cherry Creek Mortgage Illinois Residential Mortgage License LMB #0005759 Cherry Creek Mortgage NMLS #: 3001) over 9 years ago

Hi Larry, Nannette, Missy, Caren, Karen, Matt, Nancy, Harry, Erik, Kate, Libby, and Jamie.  Thanks so much for reading.

The parents were actually very supportive.  They were happy that prices have come down and were very encouraging.

Every day is a new experience.

Thanks again,


Posted by Ken Tracy, Helping clients buy and sell since 2005 (Keller Williams Realty Infinity) over 9 years ago

I love your blog here.  LOL!!  Ken.....let's face it.  Mom has the power!  I had a similar story in the past too.  My young client brought his parents - which was great.  And I 'sensed' right away that mom had to approve and love a property in order for him to buy it.  It was not as if he could not decide... but he was young and it was his very first condo... so his mom had to make sure that he was making right decisions.  I started even sending potential listings to both my client and his mom.... so they could discuss and choose which ones they wanted to see and it worked out GREAT. 

Good luck! 

Posted by Yuno Marioni (Coldwell Banker Bain) over 9 years ago

Well you did ask and so now you have it.  What did you do next.  Do you wish you had not asked.  Trust me it will always surface.


Posted by Team Honeycutt (Allen Tate) over 9 years ago

Hi Ken,

It is really important to find out what mom wants for her child and educate mother and child to the current market conditions.

Take care.

Posted by Kevin O'Shea, White Plains, NY Real Estate (Coldwell Banker) over 9 years ago

Hi Kevin, Shelton, and Yuno.  Thanks for reading.

I want them comfortable around me.  And be open.

Thanks guys.


Posted by Ken Tracy, Helping clients buy and sell since 2005 (Keller Williams Realty Infinity) over 9 years ago

Ken:  Watch out for the comment above me.  It is a spam comment.  I have seen perhaps ten of them tonight.  Also... I suggest you NOT click on the link... since it is spam... and may lead to some virus or trojan horse.  I suggest you DELETE the comment.  Take care...

Posted by Karen Anne Stone, Fort Worth Real Estate (New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County) over 9 years ago

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